A Spa Treatment It's Not

It's Treatment Day! Doesn't that sound fun and a little glamorous? Something that you would look forward to for relaxation and self indulgence?

Actually, it's my Herceptin Treatment Day. I only write it in my calendar as 'Treatment Day' in case I lose it and someone else finds it. Then for a brief moment they might think I am some very elegant woman that treats herself to facials, pedicures and massages on a regular basis (until they read the next page that reads, carpool @3:35, football practice 5-7, etc)!

I go to the Cancer Center every three weeks for Herceptin. It is a monoclonal antibody that it infused through a port in my chest. I envision the drug as something similar to saran wrap, that wraps itself around my cancer cells and keeps them from spreading. The treatment itself has very few side effects, the only drawback is that I am allergic to the drug, so I need an infusion of Benadryl prior to the Herceptin, which promptly launches me into la la land. Herceptin can eventually be toxic to the heart, so every 3 treatments I have a MUGA scan of the heart to make sure it is still pumping well. So far, so good!

I have been going to the Cancer Center now for 9 years. I think I should have my own parking space like the docs, but the hospital won't go for it. They do offer valet parking which is a very nice touch especially in lousy weather. I have had the same nurse, Judy, for the entire nine years. She has become one of my closest friends. She has been through everything with me, held my hand, wiped my brow, rubbed my feet (there's that 'spa' aspect again) and laughed with me a lot. I've been with her through her kids romances and eventual marriages, the birth of her first grandchild, and the loss of family. She makes having to go there a pleasure.

Even though I've been doing this for so long, I am always restless the night before a treatment. Don't sleep well, have strange dreams, toss and turn. Last night I dreamed that both Dr. B and Judy were standing at the front door of the center with long faces, saying that the reports on my heart had come back - no treatment for me. It's funny how the unconscious mind tries to fight all of our battles.

I have my treatment bag all packed. It to has gone with me each time for 9 years. I've actually worn out a few bags and like to change them to compliment the seasons. This one is a very snappy striped number, pink (of course) orange and purple. It contains a hand knitted blanket from my lovely friend Julie, a comfy neck pillow, snuggly socks, a book and a calendar. I always bring the newspaper, but never make it past the front page section before the Benadryl kicks in; that's when the blanket and pillow come in handy.

All in all, it's not too bad a way to spend a morning. I receive juice, a nice snack and can even watch a movie if I could stay awake. The hardest part for me is comprehending the sheer numbers of people that are there. The place is like a grocery store on a morning before a snow storm. Too much cancer. Mind boggling at times.

I have met so many great people at the cancer center. Wonderful, inspiring, strong people. So many have left the center because they are well now. Others have left the center after a brave fight that they could not win. It lifts my heart to see the staff has remained almost entirely the same since I arrived there. They love their patients, their work and truly are angels among us to be working in the environment that they are.

So off I go, looking forward to the 'nap'! Maybe Judy will do my nails today, too...
KG