I set the alarm for 5:15 a.m this morning.. I'll have to go upstairs and shut it off in a couple of hours. been up since 2:00 a.m.. wide-eyed and ready to go. I don't even care that I only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep last night; I've got a really long nap coming up in just a few hours.
There is nothing left to do. No pre-planning, no pre-surgery tests; it's time.
From the time I found the hernia, in February, I have been on a mission to get as healthy as possible; immune system wise, that is. Protein shakes with spinach, banana and almond milk. Three weeks ago, I was the grateful recipient of Healing Meals Project. I was delivered meals on Sunday to last through the week,for several weeks, especially prepared for me. This project is so cool; they use the Pasta Company restaurant in Avon on Saturday nights after it closes, to preare meals for those with a compromised immune system due to chemo etc. In my case, they wanted to fire up my almost non-existent immune system for surgery to ward off the MRSA that is laying in wait in my body. But the neatest part about this project is that the meals are all prepared by middle and high school students with the supervision of a chef and other adults. The meals are all organic, local organic vegetables, gluten free and protein rich. Lots of fresh fish, chicken, roasted vegetables, quinoa, soups, and their infamous Immune Boasting Broth. And it was free. Absolutely amazing and a gift that will be put to the test over the next several weeks. I'll tell you, my hair, fingernails and skin have never looked better, so it must be doing an amazing job on the insides, too!
A wonderful friend provided me with two months worth of ASEA Redox Supplement. It enhances cellular functions and strengthens the body's natural efforts to maintain optimal health from the inside out. I drink two ounces first thing in the a.m and two more in the p.m. This is tough; it tastes exactly like pool water. But I did it; probably helped with the skin, nails, too.
I've had my diffuser basically strapped to me, also. I have been using doTerra essential oils diffused, topically and internally for over a year. I love them so much, that I began selling them a few months ago. I make my own cleaners, dryer sheets, blends for acne and blends for Torrie's seasonal asthma. I am probably half way through the process of eliminating household products that contain so many toxic chemicals and replacing them with certified therapuetic grade oils. They also help my anxiety sooo much. I love using them during meditation, too.
I have them packed to go to the hospital, just like I did last week, but this time, I'm bringing order forms! The Dr.'s and nurses love coming into my room and smelling the wonderful pure aromas of lavender, frankincense, and others.
I also began oil pulling. I read something about it, then did some research and thought what the heck, I'll give it a try. Basically, you take 1 large teaspoon of organic, non-fractionated, refined Coconut Oil (Whole Foods, Trader Joes) and I add a drop of doTerra lemon or peppermint oil, and you place it in the side of your cheek until it starts to melt. Then you just swoosh it around your mouth (like gargling), but for 15 - 20 minutes. It's tough at the beginning, but then becomes habit; I do it while I'm in the shower or putting on my makeup. Easy, peasy.
Coconut Oil is rich in essential nutrients, medium-chain fatty acids, and immune-boosting lauric acid, a nutrient rich substance which supports immune function and helps fight infection. So while you're wooshing, your soaking up these great immune system boosters, plus you're killing any bacteria that is lingering in your mouth; ready to make it's way into your bloodstream.
Water. Tons of water. I must go through 10 - 12 refills of my REUSABLE water bottle a day. I use a lemon a day also, squeezed into the water throughout the day. It's fabulously refreshing.
I eliminated caffeine. I love coffee, but I love drinking a large, iced lemon water even more.
Sugar has been the toughest because it is everywhere!. I didn't go crazy with this one, I just made a conscious effort to kill my sweet tooth by other means. I usually have a craving for sugar around 4:30, which is also when I have a nap attack. A large glass of water and a piece of fruit usually does it. I'm way past candy bars, etc. which I feel is an accomplishment, but still a long way to go.
So I'm ready. I have my Rosary that was blessed by the Pope that wonderful friends gave me. My pic line was placed yesterday, so no more digging around for veins. Now it's just the emotional part.
I'm terrified. Panic attack terrified. And I've never been like this before the countless surgeries I've had in the past. Thoughts in my mind like, you've done a lot this year and Torrie is going off to college, Tessa is almost done with college; those were benchmarks I always strived for. Coincidentally, it's the 40th anniversary of my mom's death to breast cancer on the 21st. In the dark places of the back of my mind, I'm wondering if this past year has been my last hurrah.
I'm not the least bit afraid to die. I just don't want to, anytime soon - like today, because I have so much that I want to do! I'm not ready.
In the fall, I want to open my own meditation place "Mindfulness and Matters" and I want to teach as many people as I can, what I have learned. Location, location! I want to see marriages and grandbabies, I want to grow old. Something I never thought would happen to me.
So please, if you will, lift up a prayer for me while I'm on that table today, that God will take care of me, heal me, and let me stick around here a bit longer.
I love you all so much and thank you for all of the kind words and support.
Namaste,
Kim
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